I have been suffering this week from the resurgence of arrogance, one of my ugliest and most painful defects. Arrogance is defined as “having an exaggerated sense of one’s own importance or abilities” (Oxford dictionaries online) and “insisting that others conform to our wishes, recognise our leadership….” (St. Augustine prayer book). It is essentially the magnification of my ego and the minimization of God. Lack of humility. I know it all and I don’t need your help. Disconnection and accepting this disconnection. Believing that I didn’t need to go to meetings this week because I was away from home and “I’m doing ok”. Wow! How did that happen?!
The antidote? As always, is action. Whilst I have been reminded of the necessity of continued inventory, my sponsor has also proposed “Don’t get lost in inventory.” Avoid morbid reflection. What is of vital importance is the corrective measures I take. Changing my actions and my attitudes is where my focus should be, not solely on what is “wrong” with me.
In this case, corrective measures involved the cessation of self-debate and getting to a meeting. End of. Voila. My head shut up and with my ears open I heard a beautiful variety of the human experience. For those minutes and thereafter my arrogance dissipated and peace returned.
…Human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.